I'm sure that many of you will agree that 2016 has been a rough year. Our little family has experienced such a roller coaster of highs and lows over these last 11 months. From the birth of Sweet Pea to the death of family members. It's been quite a year. But now, now I am sooooo ready for 2017. (Even though I'll probably write 2016 for at least more 6 months.)
Speaking of the baby: she's my hero. I have loved watching her these last few weeks before her first birthday grow and explore more and more. Little stinker may only be 15 pounds but by golly the girl wants to go. She's standing alone now. No holding on. No using help. She goes from sitting to standing better than I do, to be honest.
But along with her standing as come a LOT of falling down. I mean a lot. It's bittersweet to watch her go from decidedly baby, crawling around, to toddler standing on her own and even attempting to take a step.
But you know what's amazing? She sits pouting for second like "hey! That wasn't cool" and then she gets right back up and her feet. Over and over again this happens. How amazing is that?!? I wish I could bounce back like that. I really do. When I fall down I tend to lay on the floor for a while in stunned silence or truth be told let out a few select "words" before rolling over, grumbling and moaning as I get off the floor. Not that I ever randomly trip and fall.
::ahem:: Moving on...
But not my Ellie. She falls. She pouts. She gets back up. Over and over and over again. Sometimes she even skips the pouting part completely and just stand right back up. See? I told you my baby is amazing.
2016 was hard. Big changes. Big joys. Big sorrows. Big in-betweens. But my time of sitting on the floor pouting after a fall is over and I am so ready to make 2017 the year I successfully stand and walk.
My business is going to stand in 2017. It's rather terrifying but I love my job so very much and I want to ensure I keep loving it in the coming year. As hard as it is for me, somethings need to change. Luckily, I have a husband who knows my strengths and (many, many) weaknesses and knows I will do anything for anyone even if it means sacrificing my sleep and sanity.
We stayed up late last night talking about what needs to happen in 2017 to make my business run smoother and to incorporate it better in our busy season of life. I don't want my kids to remember me spending 9 hours editing each day and no time playing. I don't want my kids to remember me being stressed out over the juggling act us mompreneurs have to perform daily. And I don't want my kids to resent my going off to a shoot but instead be proud of their mom and her entrepreneurial spirit.
I have been wired to hate change. I've been wired to put my head down and just plow through no matter to cost. I would rather stand complacent but miserable instead of leaving my comfort zone. But lately I've been feeling a push. A push to do more, to be more. To go out and stand when I'm far more comfortable crawling around on the Cheerio covered floor. That's how this blog started. I felt pushed, I fought back, it pushed harder. I know it's only been like 2 weeks of writing but the comments and private messages I've received about how much people like hearing my story or how my crazy life makes them feel so much better about theres makes me feel all warm and fuzzy. I feel like I've done something right. My story is just as important as everyone else's.
So I'm taking a play from sweet baby Eleanor's play book in 2017 and I'm going to try and stand. I most likely will fall but just like Ellie I will pull myself back up (hopefully without swearing) and one day, hopefully, I'll be ready to walk.